Pope Francis B. Donal meets the curia

I took a little break from blogging for Holy Week.  Also I had nothing to say.  I was watching and waiting and trying to draw some conclusions about the new Pope and doing my best to avoid reading too many depressing and distressing articles about how he walked, his shoes, his bus, his food.

I did manage to track down a transcript of the Holy Father's first address to the gathered members of the curia.  Of course it's in Italian as he managed to fool the other cardinals into thinking he was a polyglot when in reality he can't even speak Spanish but La Stampa had provided an Irish and English translation:

Uomini, volevo solo raccogliere voi insieme per una chiacchierata. Siamo tutti uomini insieme. Io non sono il tipo di papa che sarà strisciante intorno al buio per vedere cosa stai facendo. Voglio uomini duri, uomini che sanno di più su liquami suini e di pizzi e mozzette. Non ha senso venire da me con i vostri gradi fantasia e le vostre grandi collari. E per aiutarci a iniziare insieme, come sapete ho organizzato un esercizio di team building per il prossimo fine settimana, stiamo andando tutti insieme orienteering sulle colline di Castel Gandolfo. Si potrebbe anche avere la possibilità di vedere il tuo vecchio amico. e sono contento di vedere così tanti hanno già firmato per il viaggio. Che cos'è? Cosa? Questa è la gente che arent 'andare? Siete un branco di ingrati, wimpy, ragazzi nancy!

Espressione irlandese:

Fir, bhí mé díreach tar éis a bhailiú tú le chéile le haghaidh comhrá. Tá muid gach fir chéile. Níl mé ar an chineál daidí a bheidh creeping timpeall sa dorchadas a fheiceáil cad atá tú a dhéanamh. Ba mhaith liom fir diana, fir a bhfuil a fhios níos mó faoi aoileach muc agus lása agus mozzette. Déanann sé aon chiall atá le teacht chugam le do céimeanna bhréige agus do coiléir mór. Agus chun cabhrú leat tús a chur le, mar atá a fhios agat, d'eagraigh mé cleachtadh tógála foirne le haghaidh an deireadh seachtaine seo chugainn, táimid ag dul le chéile treodóireacht i na cnoic ar Castel Gandolfo. D'fhéadfá a bheith chomh maith le deis a fheiceáil do chara d'aois. agus tá mé sásta a fheiceáil go leor sínithe a lámh leis cheana féin don turas. Cad é? Cad é? Seo iad na daoine a rud é nach bhfuil ag dul '? Tá tú a bunch de ungrateful,, buachaillí wimpy Nancy!

Espressione inglese:

Men, I just wanted to gather you together for a chat.  We're all men together.  I'm not the sort of Pope Bishop of Rome who'll be creeping around after dark to see what you're up.  I want hard men, men who know more about pigs and slurry than lace and mozzettas.  There's no point coming to me with your fancy degrees and your big collars.  And to help us get started together, as you know I've organised a team building exercise for next weekend; we're all going orienteering together in the hills above Castel Gandalfo.  You might even get a chance to see your old mate.  And I'm pleased to see so many have already signed up for the trip.  

What's that?  What?  That's the people who arent' going?  You're a bunch of ungrateful, wimpy, nancy boys!

[Editor:  I think "Pope Donal" would be better - who's going to understand "Francis B. Donal" but a sad bunch who remember Irish mitres from the 1980s?]